Recap of spending the month of February 2020 at the orphanage in Mexico

For 15 years I had wanted to take the month of February off. Really for selfish reasons like, it’s cold in Utah so I wanted some warm weather and business is slow that month so I can afford to take that much time off.

For the last 8 years I’ve visited and played with kids as well as worked in an orphanage in Colima, Mexico. You wouldn’t believe how much love these kids and workers have there. How can someone that has gone through that much pain, be happy and full of love?

For the last several years my dream changed to “I want to spend time at the orphanage for a month”.

2019 was one of the hardest years in my life and I decided I needed a sabbatical. I just needed some time away from my life and my struggles. I needed to not think of the past and not worry about the future. I just needed to “be”. I needed to focus on the here and now, to focus on just today.

Well, as it worked out, all of those dreams came together and for the past month, I have been living at the orphanage in Mexico. This was a dream that I didn’t think was possible.

As a side note, where do dreams come from? Does God place them in your heart years, even decades before to draw you that direction?

Or is it more like what is stated in the book The Alchemist “When you have a dream, the whole universe conspires to help you achieve it”.

I believe it is both.

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While I was there I was able to just “be” which is good for the soul.

I was able to meet several important people that taught me some very important things:

Stephan (Leader & Parent of Boys Home): He told me “I don’t want to assign you work. Just do the work that you see that needs to be done here. Because when you choose what needs to be done, it will be done correctly because you care about it.”

Pablo (Pastor and Maintenance): He told me "I like how Lupe (the maintenance man) works. He likes to do the work perfectly." When Pablo said this about others, it also made me want to do the work well.

Brenda (Adult helper): Always smiles and laughs. When you’re around people that are like that, you can’t help but to be more like that. (I know the opposite to be true, but never experienced it here).

Lupe (Teenage Girls House Parent w/ his wife & Maintenance): He didn’t tell me how to do a job when I worked with him. He simply does it and allowed me to follow if I chose. He’s a man of little words (it’s ok to speak less).

Gabriel (Adult helper): His favorite word to me was “espera” (wait). When he didn’t understand me, he would pull out his phone and translate what we were saying. He has a desire to understand, not just to get through the conversation. He also became a good friend there. Friendship requires time, invest the time in friends.

Michigan Group (14 people): Most have come for 20 years. They give of their time, vacation and finances to come and make the orphanage a better place by performing improvement projects and maintenance. They are standing next to the new wall that they were building to keep the river from flooding the property again. They reminded me that you should go where you are called to go.

Lety (Adult helper): Massages are her passion, I was happy to have her give me two while I was there. She mainly works at Casa Cuna (the orphanage next door that takes care of 0-5 year olds).

Abdiel (15 yr old mentally handicapped boy): He taught me compassion, a forceful embrace and when he smiled, you can’t help but to smile back. (unfortunately I don't have a picture of him)

Iguana: There are scary dragons that live in the same area that we do, but if you leave them alone, they will leave you alone.

Raymond (Repairs and Music): He came from California and has been here 3 years as a missionary. Everywhere he goes he has Christian music playing. Music makes life better, we all need more music in our lives.

Psychology Students (from a university): They came a few times while I was there to help the kids with issues. We all have issues and can use professionals (or at least good friends) to discuss what life throws at us.

This was one of our cooks. Who couldn’t use a good cook? When we have hunger, there are people that will fill our need. On a side note, be careful what you hunger for, there will always be someone or something that will fill that need.

Victor (6 or 7 years old): He is always in trouble. You wouldn't think that he would be, he's the cutest kid. When he sings worship songs his eyes slightly close and he raises his arms and you just know that he feels it with every part of his body. So why is he always in trouble? I'm not sure. But my guess is that he is like Paul (the apostle that wrote over 25% of the New Testament). Paul said "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." Romans 7:15NIV. Even an apostle of God had a hard time doing the things that he knew he should do in this world.

Children: Reminded me to hug more (they do it at almost all interactions). They helped me learn Spanish and reminded me that when you can communicate, you can go deeper in your relationships. They also taught me the universal language. The language that God and all humanity speaks. The language of love. Here they are praying over me and my safe return.

God (creator of all things): Asked me a question that I didn’t want to hear. “What would happen if you moved to Mexico and served in the orphanage”?

For weeks, multiple times a day, God’s question would come into my head. Each time I would literally tear up (as I write this now, it’s difficult to hold back the overcoming emotion that causes a humble face and tears of fear and submission). Doing that would feel like giving up my life and starting a completely new one. How could I see my family? What about my friends? And my church family that I love? How would I financially be able to do this? And my job? My job is “who I am”!

For decades I’ve loved my job. In fact when I would talk about it to people, I would always say “I have the best job in the universe!”. One day I told Pablo (Pastor & does maintenance at the orphanage) this. He said that I was wrong and with passion and a smile said that he had the best job!

It was the first time in over 15 years I had to stop and question if he or I had the better job.

As I fly back to the USA and reflect on God’s question “What would happen if you moved to Mexico and served in the orphanage?”, I must ask myself, is this a direction that God wishes for me? Or is this a situation like when God asked Abraham to sacrifice Isaac? Obviously not that drastic, but is it a question of faith in Him? God taught me that I’m having a hard time releasing my selfish desires for what He may want for my life and putting Him before anything else. 

My personal beliefs is that there isn’t a specific direction God wants for your life. There are no “right” or “wrong” decisions. Regardless of your path in life God desires great things for you and will bless you regardless of your decisions (good or bad). 

I do believe that there are exceptions to this and that there are specific things that He calls specific people to do, but most of the time it is His desire that you align your life with His desires.

All that just to say that I don’t think God’s question was to help me find the “right path”. It has helped me understand my selfish desires. 

I don’t know where my future leads, but one thing I know for sure is that God desires good things for me and He will always provide them.

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Some of us live in a very small world, we go to work, we go to church, we go home and then we repeat. Occasionally we will go on vacation. This trip really got me out of my world and showed me things that I have never seen before.  Instead of going on vacation to do something, I went to just see the world around me. To just “be”. 

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Previously I was introduced to a concept that each of us should have a “word for the year”. Last year my word was “healing”. This year my word is “relationship”. As 2020 progresses and I’m faced with choices and decisions, I will purposefully pause and reflect on my word for the year ”relationship” before choosing a path. This trip reinforced that.